Whether you're walking your kindergartener into school for the first time or watching your teen prepare for their final year of high school, the back-to-school season is full of emotions. It can be a bittersweet time marked by new beginnings and preparation.

There can also be lots of emotions this time of year and many of those emotions are rooted in anxiety or a fear of the unknown. But there are ways families can prepare—mentally, emotionally, and practically—for a smoother transition into the school year.

How parents can emotionally regulate 

Every new school year is a milestone, a reminder that your child is growing up. That growth can bring pride—but also sadness. You might find yourself reminiscing about when their backpack was bigger than they were or worrying about how they’ll handle new challenges.

Then there’s the pressure:

• Buying all the school supplies
• Making sure clothes and shoes fit
• Navigating traffic, transportation, and tighter morning routines
• Choosing between bus, carpool, or walking—each with its own set of concerns

And while you're managing the logistics, you're also absorbing your child’s emotions, which can heighten your own anxieties.

Tip: Set your alarm 30 minutes earlier than your child’s. That small buffer of quiet time can make a big difference in managing your own stress and setting a calm tone for the household.

How to help children face their anxiety and uncertainty

The start of school can trigger a whirlwind of questions for kids:

• Will my teacher be nice?
• Will I understand the work?
• Will my friends still like me?
• Where are my classes? Am I even in the right ones?

Younger children may feel nervous about asking to go to the bathroom or approaching new friends. Older students might worry about fitting in, passing tough classes, or staying on track to graduate. And let's not forget: shifting from late summer nights to early morning alarms is tough—especially when you're juggling school stress on top of it.

Tip: Start the school bedtime and wake-up routine about 10–14 days before the first day. It gives the body and mind time to adjust gently.

Preparing children for the school year

Before school starts, one of the most powerful ways to help children face the school year with confidence is conversation. School isn’t something “happening to them”—they are active participants. They have agency over their emotions, responses, attitudes and beliefs. Those attitudes and beliefs can also determine whether they have a good day at school or a hard one. For many students, having a positive mindset can take practice. 

Tips for using conversation to prep emotionally:

• Talk about what the school day might look like—from lunchtime to classroom expectations
• Practice asking for help, introducing themselves to peers, and advocating for their needs
• Involve them in decisions: What backpack to use, what to wear, what to eat for lunch
• For older kids: Discuss course choices, learning strategies, and what to do when a subject gets hard

Attending meet-the-teacher nights or school walk-throughs can also ease fears. Familiarity builds confidence.

Once school starts, emotional support doesn't end at drop-off. When your family reconnects after school, your child needs time to decompress—just like adults do after work.

Tips:

• Give them at least 30 minutes of space before diving into homework or questions
• Expect some emotional outbursts—especially in the early weeks. You often get the “end-of-day” version of your child, which may be the most tired, overstimulated one
• Build small, consistent check-ins (like during dinner or bedtime) to give space for honest talk without pressure

Socially, you can help by teaching your child:

• How to introduce themselves
• How to ask others to sit with them or walk with them
• How to find common ground with peers
• What healthy friendships look and feel like

Other practical tips for the entire family:  

• Start a regular routine early: Bedtime, wake-up time, and morning routines may need time to adjust. You know your family best and how much time before school starts to begin establishing a more predictable routine.
• Create a plan: Pick out outfits, prep lunches, pack backpacks.
• Get supplies early: If something’s out of stock, it’s okay—it can wait a few weeks.
• Set realistic expectations: Do what works for your family. You know best what your children can and cannot manage all at once. If you know transitions are hard, give yourself and your child grace to ease into it.
• Be patient: It takes at least two weeks to fully adjust. Expect mood swings and bumps in the road

Hope for parents and students alike

Back-to-school season brings a mixed bag—nerves, excitement, stress, opportunity. As a parent, you don't have to be perfect; just be present. Your calmness, flexibility, and reassurance can help your child thrive, not just survive, the new school year. If you find that you or your child’s anxiety is more frequent, often, or sustained, or if you note extenuating sleep and appetite issues, reach out for support from a licensed counselor who can help guide you or your child through prolonged or increased anxiety.

Take a deep breath, give yourself grace, and know that every hug, every routine, every open conversation is shaping a school year full of growth—for you and your child.

Written by Amy Curtis, senior director of counseling and mental health services, Buckner International and Tanesha Torres, LPC, LCDC, manager of clinical services, Buckner International