Encontrar a Buckner de nuevo

Family strengthening builds hopes and dreams

Chasity Nichols knew Buckner as a child but never expected her life would head in a new direction when she found Buckner again as an adult. Through her current journey with Buckner alongside her, she and her family are charting an original path of hope and happiness.

Nichols greets everyone with a big smile. She’s warm, bright, and positive. While she has faced challenges, her positive attitude is infectious. As Nichols talks more about her journey, her courage and encouragement of others shines hope and inspiration.

Growing up with Buckner

When Nichols was just nine years old, she and five siblings were removed from their home and taken to live at the former Buckner Children’s Home in Lubbock. At that time, the home provided group foster care for children in six home-like cottages on a small campus on the edge of town. Buckner later ended group foster care at the home in favor of family-based acogida familiar in the best interest of development and support for children. Buckner sold the campus in 2024.

But Nichols lived at the home until she transitioned out at 17 years old. Her departure was supported through the transition program at the time called PAL, or Preparation for Adult Living aimed at preparing youth for self-sufficiency.

Indeed, Nichols immediately faced adult challenges – a new marriage, finding housing, finding employment, bills, and soon a new baby was on the way. 

Nichols wasn’t alone in her challenges. About 20% of young people who are in foster care must transition out at the age of 18. They often struggle to find a home and may face homelessness, according to Bekah Coggins, director of transition services for Buckner in Lubbock. Nearly 23,000 kids age out of the foster system in the U.S. each year, and about 1,000 in Texas, she says.

Encontrar a Buckner de nuevo

After living on her own for a while, Nichols, then married with three children, moved back to Lubbock in 2016. She was trying hard to get on her feet and working to bring stability to a struggling marriage.

As it turns out, a family member had recently been part of Buckner Family Pathways® in Lubbock, a residential program for single parents that allows them to pursue an education while still providing for her children. She encouraged Nichols to reach out to the Buckner Family Hope Center® for support.

“I reached out to Buckner because I knew I needed counseling. I wanted to save my marriage, and I would do everything I could to make it work. I came from a broken home, and I wanted it to be different for my kids,” she recalls.

The help and hope were almost immediate, Nichols says of starting family coaching and counseling. “It opened up doors for me and my kids.”

Family coaching provides one-on-one support with a coach who helps create goals, particularly related to family as well as positive steps toward a stable future. Together, coach and client work through obstacles and challenges together.

“Counseling helps explore why things are happening. Coaching on the other hand helps you come up with an action plan with steps and due dates and gently holds you accountable. Family coaching is very solution focused,” said Mandy Terry, director of the Buckner Family Hope Center in Lubbock. “We walk alongside them and help determine if their action plan is working. If not, let’s pivot. I’m in your corner.”

Nichols’s struggling marriage and other life challenges began to take their toll on her and her children. It was time to start a fresh, healthy chapter in their lives. Ultimately the marriage ended. It was a hard time, she admits, 

But at the same time, Nichols began to set different goals for herself in meaningful and exciting ways that included enrolling in college. Having a coach was the safety net she needed to make positive change, she says.

“Coaching helped me get the hard things done. I wasn’t addressing some of my problems because I was scared to make decisions and do them on my own,” she recalls. “But when I met with my coach, I would leave here feeling so relieved. Those sessions guided me through the week ahead.”

“And I realized I could do this. Coaching helped me handle my emotions better. It helped me stay motivated.”

Indeed, what’s powerful about family coaching is that Nichols conquered them herself, adds Terry.

“Completing your own goals is why family coaching is so powerful . Chasity did the work. One of the core things to being successful in coaching is the motivational piece. They have to want it for themselves,” Terry says. “Chasity was successful because her motivation and drive to get herself in a better situation was so strong. She just needed support and confidence. If there were barriers she was experiencing, we found solutions. She just needed people in her corner to help her and believe in her.”

As she navigated divorce, counseling and family coaching also helped her support her children during the time of change.

“Coaching helped me figure out how to maneuver talking to the kids about their feelings. We can sometimes bottle things up and move forward and set aside our feelings. I learned more about how to talk to them and help them be more open to other people, how to maneuver feelings and express themselves.”

Dreams for the future

The mother of three beams when she shares that she graduates in May from South Plains College with a degree in culinary services with plans to enter the catering business. However, her dream is to open a soup kitchen where anyone is welcome. She vividly recalls arriving at a soup kitchen as a six-year-old child with her mother and six children but they were turned away for arriving too close to closing time. 

“I love what food does for people. Even if I don’t end up in catering, I know in my heart that I want to open a soup kitchen someday. That’s my end goal,” she says with a huge smile. “I would never turn anyone away from eating. There will be no stipulations. Many organizations don’t realize that their stipulations and paperwork can make people’s lives a lot harder.”

Nichols’s studies, her goals and accomplishments, and big dreams have sparked hope in her children too. Her face lights up when she talks about the hope and plans her children have for their own lives. Xavion is 16 and studying culinary services in high school. Xa-Nyh is 14 and is planning to be in the medical field to help others. And at just 13 years old, Xa-Rhya dreams of working in the beauty industry as an esthetician.“I would tell other moms to open yourself up to change. Venture out because there is more,” she smiles. “And give yourself grace. If you don’t move forward, don’t think it means you can’t. Give yourself grace but don’t give up. You can achieve monumental change.”